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Summary: Looking thru the song of songs and what it teaches us about relationships and sex.

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INTRO: This morning we are continuing our series through the book of Song of Songs (Song of Solomon). Let’s review for those who’ve missed:

-This book is 8 chapters long, taking a couple and giving you 7 snapshots of their relationship. Imagine a 3,000 year old document that, if you can apply these concepts to your life, will not only deepen your relationship with God, but spouse, and friends.

-Solomon, King of Israel, is out looking over his vineyards when he meets a country girl, Shulamith. She captures the king’s heart. For some time the king pursues her and makes periodic visits to see her.

-Solomon asks her to marry him. Shulamith gives serious consideration and she accepts. Some important concepts we’ve looked at:

: Attraction – your character and servanthood are more important than your appearance.

: Relationship takes time, there needs to be respect. The will is more important than feelings. : Three factors of a healthy relationship

: Becoming one, idea of counting the cost

TITLE: The Path of Becoming One – Pt. 2

TEXT: Song of Songs 4:5-16

Background: Solomon and Shulamith have gone through the wedding ceremony and now are in the bridal chamber. Solomon has progressed to removing her veil and undressing her.

-This morning I’m going to talk about ten important factors of intimacy.

1. The first important factor of intimacy is romance – v. 1-4. I talked about it last week (I trust the handouts blessed you).

2. The second important factor of intimacy is gentleness – v. 5

a. Tommy Nelson – "Greatest and most inspired bit of text as to how a man should see his wife". He’s talked to her now he has undressed her.

Q: Men, how do you approach the sexuality of your wife?

-You approach as you would two fawns of a gazelle to take a picture not as a hunter going and blasting away, but as a photographer. It’s slowly and gently.

b. Joseph Dillow – The reference was a Dorcus gazelle, an animal about two feet high at the shoulders, and a marvel of lightness and grace. Their beauty creates within his heart a desire to reach out and fondle them, as one would pet a gazelle feeding by a brook.

c. Idea presented by Solomon is to move slowly and gently. The parameter you and your wife share is up to both of you. Learn to communicate. If you have trouble talking about things, write it down.

d. Men, when it comes to intimacy, we have the tendency to try the same combination over and over again (like opening a safe, it worked before, it’ll work again).

-Reality the same old combination does not work all the time (try something different).

-Generally speaking, men are easier to please when it comes to intimacy (like a dragster off the line, they are ready instantly). While the woman is slow initially like a Volkswagen, but can easily out distance the dragster in the long run.

-Men, in order to have deep intimacy, you have to be sensitive, patient, conscious of your approach. Approach your wife like you would the two fawns.

3. Third important factor of intimacy – is that it is exhilarating.


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