Summary: The Sanctity of marriage is determined by God and not by our opinion, and not by what society thinks about it.

The Sanctity and honor of marriage

Ephesians 5:15-5:33


This morning I want to bring you the second part of Building Relationships. It is also a part of the series “Nuts and Bolts of life”.

If I can refresh your memory, I showed an image of a bridge and that bridge is our relationship with others and with God.

The problem with most is that there relationship with God is damaged and that reflects on how we treat others around us.

We looked at 4 areas of relationships


That was the people we meet but remain at a distance.

You would not share personal things with them.


These are people that you share activities with (bowling, golf, maybe dinner as a group)

People you know at church, but do not do anything with outside of Sunday

This has not moved into a trusting relationship


You do personal things with them.

You call them if you have not seen them for awhile.

There is minor commitment

You choose to reach out to them.

Close Friends (last one we looked at last week)

You reach out to them and they respond back to you.

You know them and they know you.

They know your faults and they still choose to reach out to you.

This person is fun to be around.

They are supporter s of you and are there when you need them

You just enjoy being around them.

Now, here’s where we move on!

If you are at a close friend relationship with people of the same gender, nothing has to change- that friendship must be nurtured to stay at that level.

If this level is with a person of the opposite sex and you begin to have sexual desires and feelings that are deeper than friendship- you desire to move to intimacy. God has a word for us.

Text- Ephesians 5:15-5:33

Marriage is the most intimate relationship you can have with someone.

Friendships are built on mutual respect, trust, love, and common interest.

Marriage has its foundation built on all these qualities and our commitment to the Lord first and then to our spouse.

There must be someone in charge or there is kaios among the camp.

What if at work there was no boss?

What if you kids had no authority to look too?

What if there were no laws? People did what they wanted.

You get the point.

In marriage approved and anointed of God, there is an order of authority also. Now before you go and get all defensive, I want to clarify what God word declares for marriage.

Women before you get upset with the word submit.

Men, before you get on your pedestal and yell “I’m the boss.” Here is what God says about it.

It begins with Genesis 2:24

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and will be united to his wife and they will become one flesh.”

They will become united with each other.

King James version says cleave to each other- glued together! They leave their father and mother and are united to each other.

Two things have to happen here the day of the marriage

The parents have to let go! They don’t abandon their kids, they are there if they need them, but they must let go. The parents are in charge while under their roof, but they are no longer in charge.

Second thing- the kids have to let go of the parents. They must strive to become independent of past support and build support between husband and wife.

Trouble comes if one or both do not let go.

Couple begins to build their relationship

Both should be followers of Christ- both seeking God’s best for their lives.

Both should be looking for the Lord to lead them and guide them individually and as a couple.


The divine intention for husband and wife is monogamy (oneness) together they form a union that is inseparable. Sexual union is an expression of that oneness.

Alright, here we go!

(22) “wives submit to your husband as to the Lord”

(24) “Husbands love your wife just as the Christ loved he church and gave himself up for her”.

Submit here ladies is not a under the thumb do as you are told submission, it is an act of obedience as unto the Lord.

As your husband is following the Lord, you as an act of obedience to the Lord should follow

As a church is to submit to Christ, the wife is to submit to the husband.

That does not say that you have no opinion, it does not say that the husband is always right.

Husbands, you are to love your wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.

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