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Most of us can sympathize with the fellow who received a call from his wife just as she was about to fly home from Europe. “How’s my cat?” she asked.

“Dead.”

“Oh, honey, don’t be so honest. Why didn’t you break the news to me slowly? You’ve ruined my trip.”

“What do you mean?”

“You could have told me he was on the roof. And when I called you from Paris, you could have told me he was acting sluggish. Then when I called from London, you could have said he was sick, and when I called you from New York, you could have said he was at the vet. Then, when I arrived home, you could have said he was dead.”

The husband had never been exposed to such protocol but was willing to learn. “OK,” he said. “I’ll do better next time.”

“By the way,” she asked, “how’s Mom?”

There was a long silence, then he replied, “Uh, she’s on the roof.”

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