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Let me make sure that we clear up a few misunderstandings about forgiveness. Before we can build, we have to blast. We have to blast away the erroneous thoughts on what forgiveness is not.


· When you forgive a person, this does not mean you are immediately healed.

· When you forgive a person, this does not mean you are going to be buddy/buddy.

· When we forgive a person, this does not mean we surrender the right to restitution or justice when appropriate.

· When we forgive a person, this does not mean that we trust them, yet.

· When we forgive a person, we are not avoiding pain, we are opening the door to healing.

· When we forgive, we take the journey at the pace we are able to handle...the deeper the hurt, the longer the journey.


(Lewis B. Smedes, The Art of Forgiveness. Christian Family Book Club, Division of Ballantine Publishing Group, Random House, Inc. New York, 1996, pg. 177-178. These quotes are used on the back of the book to review some of the highlights about forgiveness.)

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