Fred Isaac Fendley
April 23,2003
Although Fred Isaac Fendley made his entrance into the world on September 20, 1920 in the deep south in Birmingham, Alabama, God had taken note of his presence in heaven a long time before that. For the Scriputes tell us in Psalm 139:13-16 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, 16your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
One of the most encouraging things about walking with God is knowing that God has a plan and a purpose for your life. Although we are under the illusion that our lives are going to go on and on, God tells us from the start, that our our days are numbered, and to use wisdom with how we spend them. We receive 25,567 days if we lived to be 70. We can be assured that one day we will stand before God , and we will be judged for the way in which we have used our days. Have you thought recently about how many days you have left.
God is never going to ask us about how somebody else used up their days. We hear all the time about the person who will not go to church because he or she does not want to be in the church with the hypocrites. Not only do they fail to understand hypocrites need the message of the gospel, but God is not impressed with their decision to cut Him out of their lives. God is only going to ask us to answer for us, because we do not all start at the same point in life, nor do we have the same opportunities, gifts, talents, or skills.
God created each one of us to be us, in our relationship to Him. He never intended for any of us to remain as we are, but for all of us to be changed by the power of His Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus put it this way, “I came that you might have life and have it more abundantly.”
We are celebrating tonight, because Fred Isaac Fendley entered into a personal relationship with Jesus, and allowed Jesus to live in and through him. When I look at his Mr. Fendley’s life, the word that comes to mind to describe him is persistence.
He was born into a hostile environment for Blacks starting his life in the 20’s in one of the most racist parts of the country in Birmingham, Alabama. They were bombing churches in Birmingham in the 60’s. Can you imagine what they were doing in the 20’s and the 30’s. The KKK was on the rise across the nation. It was not an ideal time or place to be born black. Jim Crow with his laws of segregation and separation were becoming more widespread in every area of society.
The Booming Stock market was not anything to touch the lives of negroes in the deep south. I doubt if the Fendley’s lost any stocks in the Great crash in the late 20’s. Fred entered his high school days in the midst of the Great Depression. His family knew the true meaning of the word struggle. But not even Jim Crow could thwart God’s plans and purpose for Fred’s life. His obituary does not say, he gave up hope, quit school, and talked about what could have been.
No it reads of a life of persistence. It tells of a young black boy who wanted to make something of his life. It was hard just being black, but to have dark skinned, you got it coming at you from the white folks on the one hand and the black folks on the other. The blacker you were, the closer to the end of the line you got to stand,
But that did not stop Fred from doing something with his life. He not only went to high school, he finished. From there he went on to college. He had to do this at a time when money was short, and people didn’t expect you to succeed. His life is a testimony of what God can do with our young Black Males if we give God the chance and decide to make something of our lives besides babies.
God gave Fred a sense of whit and intelligence to go along with his persistence. Fendley could catch you off guard with a joke before you knew it. When I’d go over to his house, he’d say, “Hey, come on in and sit down. Then he’d turn and say, “quick hide the food the preacher is here.” He’d laugh and say, “no I was just joking, you can have some pie or cake or something, but just get a little piece.”
One of the loves of Fendley’s heart was sports. He could play some baseball and football. He played them both in high school and college. But eventually his love for sports led him to playing golf. In another time and era, he may have become a Tiger Woods. He was very proud of his two holes in one back in the 60’s. One of them came at the Seneca Golf Course and the other at the Highlands.
I suspect Fendley loved golf a little too much, because I believe he and John Moffett were out there on the golf course when they should have been in church on some Sunday mornings. They are probably in heaven together trying to come up with a good reason for why God should not hold that against them. May God’s mercy be upon them both.
Fendley’s persistence paid off with his work habit. He’s a model of a man who was committed to taking care of his family. For thirty five years he worked with the post office. He went to work whether he felt like it or not. The people around him enjoyed him because of his sense of humor. He thoroughly enjoyed receiving twenty one years of retirement checks.
Fendley’s persistence paid off with his response to the call of Christ on his life. He accepted God’s offer to turn his life over to Him. Others recognized God’s call on him, and he was elected as a deacon at our church. The deacons are those who are to demonstrate compassion toward others. Fred went on to become the moderator of the deacons. He gave of himself to the Men’s Organization here at the church. There have been many people who have had their hearts lifted on a Sunday morning by the gift of humor that God had placed inside of him.
When we came to Glenville, Mr. Fendley would always look so serious at first. He’d make a comment and we didn’t know how to take it, until he would burst into his half laugh and say I was just joking. He did tell me that he thought Pastor Toby was a great and speaker, and that I was alright, but could use a little help. Then he laughed and said, “No, you both are doing a fine job. We’re really glad to have you.” He also told me once, “you’re doing a good job, but you don’t need to try to sing any songs.” He never did say he was joking about that.
Fendley was persistent in his walk with Christ. He came to worship each Sunday until it was physically too much of a challenge for him to be here. When we would visit him at home, he’d still try using his humor to lift our spirits. But to truly understand the gift and example Fred Isaac Fendley gave to the world, we have to go back to the late thirties.
The year was around 1939. Hitler was on the move in Germany and Europe. But there was a far more important move taking place in Birmingham, Alabama. This beautiful young eleventh grade girl had moved into the city and was now at Fred’s school. It did not take long for the boys to want to make their move, and brother Fred was not planning on being left out of the pack. Fendley’s persistence paid off in his choice of love.
He made his line or two, but Aralander Mason was a no nonsense young lady, and Fred did not make much of an impact but neither did the rest of the boys. Pastor Toby and I asked sister Fendley, what made Fred stand out. She said, “well he was persistent.” Fred would not give up. He took his time and tried building a friendship.
Then he got ready for the move. When he thought he had won her heart, he asked her, “do you love me.” She responded, “I don’t know.” Strike one. Being a former baseball player, he tried again. Anybody could miss once. This was not enough to cause him to lose heart, so he asked her again, “do you love me.” She responded, “I don’t know.”
Strike two. One more pitch like this and it might be over. So this time he decided to throw a curve ball to help her out a little bit. He said, “aw come on, you know that you love me.” This time she said, “well, I guess I do.” It was a homerun hit. He was on his way, but he still had to go through her family.
When Ara brought him to her mother, her mom said, “he’s a nice young man.” Her mom had the opportunity to know it. In those days at the Mason’s house, you had two hours to court on a date. Sister Fendley’s mother like Fred so much, she spent the first hour of the date with him, and then reminded Ara at the end of the second hour he had to leave. Fred obviously did not mind this arrangement too much because he went on to tell Ara, “one day we’re going to get married.” He had learned not to ask her if she wanted to marry him. She said, four years later they were married.
Their relationship began on a basis of being good friends. Together they built a marriage based on friendship, love and commitment. When they said “I do”, they did, and they did it for 61 years and four months till death did them part. Let’s give them a round of applause for proving that marriage can last a lifetime and God can make a difference.
People complain about being different in marriage. But we need to recognize God gives us differences to help us stay in balance. Mr and Mrs Fendley both have quit whit and great sense of humor. In their marriage, she was the sensible no nonsense person. He was the one he was ready to live and let live. If it had not been for her, they may have stayed broke.
Brother Isaac, loved to be fashionable. He knew how to dress, and didn’t mind spending money to look good in his suits and his clothes. But he didn’t just think about himself, he would go out and shop for his wife and bring back alligator shoes, cashmere coats and more. Now Ara being more conservative, was not that crazy about some of the things he went out and bought, but she said “I wore them, because I knew he wanted to see me in them.”
What’s a key to 61 years of marriage. Ara would tell you, it’s knowing when to give and when to take. It’s taking time to understand what’s important to the other person. It’s trusting each other. It’s knowing that you are in a partnership together, so there’s no need to try to outdo each other whether for good or for bad. It’s letting go of grudges and choosing to forgive. One of the things Ara admired about her husband was that he taught her what relationships were all about and how they were to work together as a team. Thank God for men like Fred Isaac Fendley who value the input of their wives in decision making and everyday living.
Fred loved sports and loved to watch them on TV. Ara learned the ends and outs of all the sporting events for his sake. You see whenever he had to go somewhere or leave the room he wanted her to watch the sporting program so that she could tell him what had happened. Love does things like that, not because you have to, but because you’re willing. Now today, she enjoys watching sports on television.
Fred and Ara knew what it was like to be friends in their marriage. They took time to be with each other, taking trips to Canada, going across country to the Old World Fairs, visiting Puerto Rico to study it’s history. There have been storms in their lives, but they made a commitment to be together and that commitment did not fail. Together God has seen them through.
When we asked Ara, what would Mr. Fendley say was key in being married for 61 years, she said, “He would probably say “don’t take everything so seriously. Lighten up and enjoy life.”
I had the opportunity of seeing the power of love demonstrated in a healing. Mr. Fendley was at Euclid Hospital. The doctors had told Ms. Fendley that there was little chance of hope. There was nothing they could do to get any kind of a response from Mr. Fendley. When I came into the hospital and into the intensive care unit, I saw Ms. Fendley, holding his hands and stroking his forehead.
After I came in we talked about what the doctors had said. We prayed together. When she said,” Isaac, it’s me Ara, your wife, “I love you.” It was at that moment that he responded and opened his eyes. Her “I love you” brought him of the coma he was in when all the doctor’s medicine could not. The doctors could not believed that he responded.
Mr. Fendley enjoyed a few more years of life after that event. He laughed, he talked, celebrated birthdays, and more wedding anniversaries, thanks to the power of his wife’s words “I love you.” It is a tribute also to how Sister Fendley has stood so faithfully by her husband during his times of illness. At times she has sacrificed her own health, to make sure his needs were being taken care of. May it one day be said of us here today, that they took care of each other as Fred and Ara took care of each other.
On the morning of Good Friday, Pastor Toby went with Ms. Fendley to the hospital. The decision had been made to take him off the respirator. They prayed together. Sister Fendley wanted to stay there by her husband’s side. She would call Pastor Toby when she was ready to leave. At about 4 that afternoon, I went to the hospital, and again I saw Ms. Fendley over her husband with the same love and compassion as I had seen a few years earlier. Mr. Fendley was struggling to breath and was not responding.
When I came in Ms. Fendley left to go to the lady’s room.. I started talking to Mr. Fendley and letting him know it was Good Friday and I was going through some of the seven last words of Jesus. I said to him, just like Jesus, declared to God, “Into your hands I commit my spirit.” Go ahead and commit your spirit to God and be set free. I then said, “I know you said I couldn’t sing, but we are going to have church and I’m the only one here to lead the singing so I’m going to do it. Since he did not object I went ahead and sang three hymns.”
When Ms. Fendley returned from the rest room, I informed her that I had song three hymns with him. She laughed and said, “oh no, something definitely is gong to happen now.” Her last words to her husband of 61 years and four months, before were left were, “Isaac, were’ going now. I love you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
With those words, a rich and beautiful love story between a gentle Black man and a lovely Black woman and was coming to an end. Their example of love and commitment is a gift to us all of what is possible when two people work together.
Ms. Fendley was right when she said, something is definitely going to happen. I don’t know if Mr. Fendley was afraid I’d come back with his wife and sing some more the next day or not, but I do know, the prayer I prayed with Him for God to receive His spirit had been answered. Less than 30 minutes after we left his room , his Spirit went home to be with the Lord.
We may say Fred Isaac Fendley was my friend, he was my uncle, he was my brother,, or he was my husband, but the greatest truth of them all is that he was a child of God who has now completely returned to God. For those of us who die without knowing Jesus Christ , Fred Fendley will only be a memory, a very good and loving memory. But for those of us who do know Jesus Christ, Fred Fendley is simply waiting to meet us on the other side. When Ara said “I’ll see you tomorrow, she was prophesying of the day when all of us shall one day be together.
Fred is ready to stand in the presence of Jesus Christ, and fully expects to hear the words, "Well done thou good and faithful servant enter into the joy of my kingdom." We need not wonder what the future holds for him
When Jesus died on the cross and rose from the dead, he not only paid the penalty for our sins, he conquered death and promised us eternal life if we would believe in Him and follow in his footsteps. Fred Isaac Fendley is more alive now than he ever was, and one day we shall be with him. For the Bible clearly teaches,
1 Th 4:13 Brothers and sisters , we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men and women, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord’s own word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left till the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep.
For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever.
