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THE DEVIL'S BEATITUDES


1. Blessed are those who are too tired, too busy, too distracted to spend even an hour once a week with their fellow Christians – they are my best workers.


2. Blessed are those Christians who wait to be asked and expect to be thanked -- I can use them.


3. Blessed are the touchy who stop going to church –for they are my missionaries.


4. Blessed are the trouble makers – for they shall be called my children.


5. Blessed are the complainers –for their complaints are music to my ears.


6. Blessed are those who keep a list of the preachers mistakes -- for they get nothing out of his sermons.


7. Blessed is the church member who expects to be invited to his own church – for he is a part of the problem instead of the solution.


8. Blessed are those who gossip -- for they shall cause strife and divisions that please me.


9. Blessed are those who are easily offended -- for they will soon get angry and quit.


10. Blessed are those who do ...

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